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June 22, 2011

I’ve got a big choice to make. I had planned to discuss my exchange qualms about whether I go to Manchester or Sheffield, but I’m hoping I can solve that tomorrow. So, onto my other pressing issue.

Originally I planned to defer next semester – to practise lots of music, engage in plenty of reading, to not get so caught up in the rat race of uni and to have plenty of time to find myself. It would also allow me to pick up guitar and bass as I so wish to properly do, as well as become the drummer and keyboardist (who am I kidding; organist) that I so wish to be. Really, university should be about finding and creating yourself, and a lot of it is that, except that when you’re in a rush to churn out an essay after essay, while you are no doubt stimulating your brain you’re also burning out. Learning should be highly engaging in all facets of one’s life, not a simple essay-bust cycle. This isn’t to criticise university education, when Sydney Uni has taught me so much, and more than teaching me facts it’s taught me how to think, how to rail against orthodoxy perptuated by arrogance and self-interest and how to properly execute an argument and point out logical flaws.

I then chose to do part-time, as deferring would create too little structure and I’d find myself getting bored. It would allow me to continue my degree, is better for the transition to exchange next year (deferral to overseas would be a bit of a transition), and prevents a massive overload on semester one subjects as opposed to second semester subjects. However, I also want to do honours, and I’ve found out that as ecop honours requires coursework int he first semester and a thesis in the second, that I cannot start honours halfway through the year. Thus, if I do part-time next semester, I’ll still have two units left to do in 2013, so it won’t be until 2014 that I can start honours. And, not kidding myself, I really want to do honours, especially now that I find out that if I choose to study post-grad at the London School of Economics as I so sorely desire to do (although I should probably research that a bit more, for now it’s just the name/prestige alone motivating me – the alternative is Camrbidge), it is a pre-requisite.

Thus, do I finish my three year degree on time, do honours, and then go to LSE/Cambridge in 2014 (not that there’s even any guarantee I’ll be able to or even want to, it’s honestly not too much more than a flight of fancy)? Or do I do as originally planned, focus on developing myself, do part-time, let things flow, become the musician I want to be, as well as have the ability to generally read more things. The upside of the way this works out is that I could in fact do part-time for the rest of my uni career, ie: next semester, second semester 2012 and both first and second in 2013 (as first 2012 is on exchange, where I have to do full time). Or I could finish it off sooner and have a uni-free semester. It would largely give me more free time, at the cost of expediency.

I guess it really boils down to; do I have my honours at 22 or 23? Which I guess isn’t really the biggest issue, but it’s an important thing to think about, as it will define a lot of how I approach things such as music in my life. I want to be the best musician I can, but if I choose the path of full-time and then post-grad in England, that just about wraps up any musical career I have. Part of me cries out at the idiocy of delaying myself a whole year. The other part considers the former a weak, cowardly fool who would never aspire towards greatness.

Perhaps it doesn’t really matter. After all, there is no dark side of the moon really. As a matter of fact it’s all dark.


From → Personal

  1. i guess just make sure if you end up spending an extra year that you’ll actually use all the time. otherwise probably a bit of a waste…

    • Actually use all the time how? As in actually do the practising and reading? Yeah I get what you’re saying.

      Tbh given that I’ll likely only do 3 subjects at the UK unis, it may only count for 3, not 4 subjects, even though I’m doing full time, so I may end up having a unit left to do even if I do full time all the way.

      That’s a bit of a longshot though.

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